My definition of fear is as follows: Fear is a biological and biochemical response to uncertainty. Whenever there is uncertainty in our lives, fear kicks in. So if we believe that fear is the opposite of love we tend to make ourselves wrong for being afraid. But the only way for us to be truly happy is to give and grow, and if we are going to grow there will always be uncertainty in our lives, which can be pretty scary.
Is it unloving to be afraid of an attacking animal when in the woods? is in unloving to fear for the safety of your child? Is it unloving to be scared of uncertainty in any way? I would say a resounding No! We need fear. If we didn't feel afraid we wouldn't be able to evolve and grow and survive. You and I both want to be alive, so I would say we need fear. So that means that the message we modern-day people get is that our own self-preserving biology is killing our dreams.
These beliefs cause a couple of problems. First it makes us wrong for being afraid and second, it makes us wrong for having negative thoughts. Which to me is ludicrous. Being afraid and having negative thoughts are perfectly normal human biological functions. There is absolutely nothing wrong with feeling these feelings. We are, after all, emotional beings. It's what sets us apart from other members of the animal kingdom.
Here's the kicker; The only way to be truly happy is to be growing. And the thing you must do to grow is face uncertainty. Uncertainty comes with fear in tow. The two are nearly inseparable. We need to realize that uncertainty is a force that will always be there, in every area of our lives, whether we want it or not.
I remember when I was travelling to a city I hadn't been to before and got lost. I was alone, it was getting dark and I was not in the best part of town. Actually, I was starting to feel a little afraid. I finally swallowed my pride and stopped at a gas station to ask directions. I was feeling uncertainty, but in the moment it took for the young gentleman gave me directions to where I was going, I was no longer afraid. I now had certainty. What had changed? Nothing other that I now had certainty. My feelings changed in an instant because of certainty and I was no longer afraid. Did I feel unloving towards anyone or anything? No. So how could love be linked to fear in any way?
There is a quote by Tony Robbins that goes like this: "The quality of your life is the quality of your relationship with uncertainty."
I'd love to hear your comments or some of the stories you may have regarding feeling afraid and uncertain.
As always, take what resonates with you and leave the rest,
And remember, "You're the one!"
Is it unloving to be afraid of an attacking animal when in the woods? is in unloving to fear for the safety of your child? Is it unloving to be scared of uncertainty in any way? I would say a resounding No! We need fear. If we didn't feel afraid we wouldn't be able to evolve and grow and survive. You and I both want to be alive, so I would say we need fear. So that means that the message we modern-day people get is that our own self-preserving biology is killing our dreams.
These beliefs cause a couple of problems. First it makes us wrong for being afraid and second, it makes us wrong for having negative thoughts. Which to me is ludicrous. Being afraid and having negative thoughts are perfectly normal human biological functions. There is absolutely nothing wrong with feeling these feelings. We are, after all, emotional beings. It's what sets us apart from other members of the animal kingdom.
Here's the kicker; The only way to be truly happy is to be growing. And the thing you must do to grow is face uncertainty. Uncertainty comes with fear in tow. The two are nearly inseparable. We need to realize that uncertainty is a force that will always be there, in every area of our lives, whether we want it or not.
I remember when I was travelling to a city I hadn't been to before and got lost. I was alone, it was getting dark and I was not in the best part of town. Actually, I was starting to feel a little afraid. I finally swallowed my pride and stopped at a gas station to ask directions. I was feeling uncertainty, but in the moment it took for the young gentleman gave me directions to where I was going, I was no longer afraid. I now had certainty. What had changed? Nothing other that I now had certainty. My feelings changed in an instant because of certainty and I was no longer afraid. Did I feel unloving towards anyone or anything? No. So how could love be linked to fear in any way?
There is a quote by Tony Robbins that goes like this: "The quality of your life is the quality of your relationship with uncertainty."
I'd love to hear your comments or some of the stories you may have regarding feeling afraid and uncertain.
As always, take what resonates with you and leave the rest,
And remember, "You're the one!"
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